Genre: Christian Pop/Rock/Country is what we we're aiming for. This co-write is with a friend of mine in Kentucky. This is an acoustic version, but I want to rock it up a little once we get all three elements of the song right. Lyric, melody and chord progression.
At no point am I trying to sound like a solo artist here. This recording is a one shot, just plugged in and played rough demo. No effects, no in-depth production and no auto-tune. I tried to stay in time the best I could.
Give it to me straight. I can take it!
There are 6,242 titles registered at BMI, ASCAP has 4,994 results and who knows how many floating around the world with the one word title. Looks like Katy Perry holds the top spot on this song title right now according to Google.
Ronnie, thank you for sharing this song. I like your chorus and I love your finger picking. As far as titles go, I noticed you did a little research, lol. It’s true titles are important, and as someone told me recently, your title is king. After hearing that advice, I went back through my own songs and about half of them had titles that just plain sucked, lol. Got some work to do myself, lol. Sometimes the title is just what it is, but it just means that the song, or the hook or the title just needs some work still. Anyway, I like the feel of this song. I’m no expert, just a fellow songwriter, but you may want to try and come up with a stronger line or two in the chorus that have a greater emotional punch. I really like your last line, though. “A love strong enough to help you rise.” That’s good. Something else you may try in the verses, especially the first verse. Your verses are where you can add imagery to paint the picture a bit. You might try something like this for the first verse:
“There’s a pile of bills by the front door
A crumpled pink slip on the floor
A letter from the doctor on the counter by your phone
But you are stronger, stronger than you know…”
Again, just a suggestion, but just a few lines to add a little sensory imagery to make the song pop a little more, so that when you finally get to the chorus, the emotional impact of the chorus is bigger now.
Thanks again for sharing. I like your voice, too! Cool sound.
June 07, 2017
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RISE bpm 116
(Mitchell Edwards/Ronnie Glenn)
Moments of darkness may come to your door
Feeling defeated, can't take anymore
All those difficulties can surely take their toll
But you are stronger, stronger than you know
Chorus
For you will rise
Just reach out for the answer
Rise
When you seem close to danger
There’s a safe place beyond the hands of time
A love strong enough to help you rise
It's a new beginning of a new day's dawn
Life's not without a struggle to move on
Look around there's a lifeboat in the water
Take a breath, time to breathe as you emerge
Repeat Chorus
(bridge)
Blood, sweat and tears shed for you and me
A comfort that's there in faith we believe
Repeat Chorus
When storms arrive
Love will help you rise
© 2017 Mitchell Edwards / Ronnie Glenn, all rights reserved.
1
Not able to listen to the music right now, but a quick thought on the bridge. The phrase “blood, sweat and tears” has been overused. Being a Christian themed song, something like this may work better:
He shed his blood and tears, shed for you and me
The comfort is in our faith we believe
This might not fit the melody, but I feel it flows better.
Keep writing!
Phillip
June 07, 2017
3
Ronnie, thank you for sharing this song. I like your chorus and I love your finger picking. As far as titles go, I noticed you did a little research, lol. It’s true titles are important, and as someone told me recently, your title is king. After hearing that advice, I went back through my own songs and about half of them had titles that just plain sucked, lol. Got some work to do myself, lol. Sometimes the title is just what it is, but it just means that the song, or the hook or the title just needs some work still. Anyway, I like the feel of this song. I’m no expert, just a fellow songwriter, but you may want to try and come up with a stronger line or two in the chorus that have a greater emotional punch. I really like your last line, though. “A love strong enough to help you rise.” That’s good. Something else you may try in the verses, especially the first verse. Your verses are where you can add imagery to paint the picture a bit. You might try something like this for the first verse:
“There’s a pile of bills by the front door
A crumpled pink slip on the floor
A letter from the doctor on the counter by your phone
But you are stronger, stronger than you know…”
Again, just a suggestion, but just a few lines to add a little sensory imagery to make the song pop a little more, so that when you finally get to the chorus, the emotional impact of the chorus is bigger now.
Thanks again for sharing. I like your voice, too! Cool sound.
June 07, 2017
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Phillip Lemmonds
Not able to listen to the music right now, but a quick thought on the bridge. The phrase “blood, sweat and tears” has been overused. Being a Christian themed song, something like this may work better:
He shed his blood and tears, shed for you and me
The comfort is in our faith we believe
This might not fit the melody, but I feel it flows better.
Keep writing!
Phillip
June 07, 2017