Sometimes it seems that ambition overrides love. That a person becomes so obsessed with making money, they get caught up in being "successful" rather than happy. This is about wanting simpler love & letting someone know just being with them is enough
My main concern is with the length... I didn't realize it until I'd listened a few times through, but it's 5 minutes long. It didn't feel long to me, but I want to know if y'all think it drags on or if there's something that obviously needs to be cut
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Golden hair suited you fine
You always prayed for all the fancy things in life
Traded your crooked smile
For a straight-laced suit and cap
But money won’t make a tender heart
Love’s not expensive like that
Boy you tried to buy me the world
Searched every oyster just to find us one good pearl
I never asked for much
Didn’t mind eating scraps
As long as we had each other baby,
And a reason to laugh
I don’t care for diamonds
I don’t want gold
I think we’re rich enough
With a hand we each can hold
Still you save every nickel and dime
Payin' for a dream that you never may find
Prayin' that someday it’ll come true
But even if it don’t, I’ll still have you
Even if it don’t, I’ll still have you
You pushed all wild hopes aside
Those delusions, they still danced around your mind
Freedom won’t be quiet
It’s still tugging at your sleeve
As long as you take me with you honey,
We can fly away and leave
I don’t care for money
I don’t want fame
We’ll never be alone
With foolish love to claim
We can save every nickel and dime
Payin' for a dream that you never may find
Prayin' that someday it’ll come true
But even if it don’t, I’ll still have you
Even if it don’t, I’ll still have you
Don’t be disappointed when life doesn’t turn out like you planned
Success is measured by the lives we touch with caring hands
And in your arms is the safest place for me in all the land
Out of breath from chasing dreams
But we’ve got a life of love just bursting at the seams
You said you’d never stop until
You’d made a name in this world
The only name I want to take is
The one that makes me your girl
Still you save every nickel and dime
Payin' for a dream that you never may find
Prayin' that someday it’ll come true
But even if it don’t, I’ll still have you
Even if it don’t, I’ll still have you
0
Caryn,
There is something about this that I really love, I don’t know if it is just the simplicity in the message, or the subtle things you’ve done with he melody.
I love the first verse. Primarily the last two lines. The last line “Love’s not expensive like that.” really helps set the stage to the whole song.
My only major feedback with the verse(s), would be that with the second line of each verse, I think you could drag them out just a tad longer. Meaning, no need to rush to the third line. I just think by giving me a bit to sit on before going to the next line will not just help fit with the great feel you’ve captured with the flow, but also help me with the story.
I also really like the first “Pre-Chorus” and think you could almost repeat it again for the second.
The chorus is really awesome! I just love the way you carry it and the honesty in the words.
As far as length, I do think you could cut it back. In my opinion, I would not want you to sacrifice too much because of length, but if you can shave out a verse or even the “bridge” you’ll save some time. To me that was the point where I started to tune out some. and get the feeling of it being long. Maybe because it felt so different.
All in all I really really love this and can already see how this could come together in the studio. It’s a great message and the feel fits you very well!
I hope this feedback is helpful. If you didn’t already, I’d also try to maybe reaching out to Sarah Spencer and some others directly by using the Request Feedback tool for some additonal feedback. It’s pretty effective and sometimes everyone doesn’t check Frettie daily.
I used the tool for the first time on that Traveling song and it really helped me get a variety of opinions posted both on Frettie and even via private messaging.
Keep this idea going. We need more songs like that. I just loved the message. Happy to see you posted another song!
July 18, 2014
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Dennis Field
Caryn,
There is something about this that I really love, I don’t know if it is just the simplicity in the message, or the subtle things you’ve done with he melody.
I love the first verse. Primarily the last two lines. The last line “Love’s not expensive like that.” really helps set the stage to the whole song.
My only major feedback with the verse(s), would be that with the second line of each verse, I think you could drag them out just a tad longer. Meaning, no need to rush to the third line. I just think by giving me a bit to sit on before going to the next line will not just help fit with the great feel you’ve captured with the flow, but also help me with the story.
I also really like the first “Pre-Chorus” and think you could almost repeat it again for the second.
The chorus is really awesome! I just love the way you carry it and the honesty in the words.
As far as length, I do think you could cut it back. In my opinion, I would not want you to sacrifice too much because of length, but if you can shave out a verse or even the “bridge” you’ll save some time. To me that was the point where I started to tune out some. and get the feeling of it being long. Maybe because it felt so different.
All in all I really really love this and can already see how this could come together in the studio. It’s a great message and the feel fits you very well!
I hope this feedback is helpful. If you didn’t already, I’d also try to maybe reaching out to Sarah Spencer and some others directly by using the Request Feedback tool for some additonal feedback. It’s pretty effective and sometimes everyone doesn’t check Frettie daily.
I used the tool for the first time on that Traveling song and it really helped me get a variety of opinions posted both on Frettie and even via private messaging.
Keep this idea going. We need more songs like that. I just loved the message. Happy to see you posted another song!
July 18, 2014
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