Hello Y’all,
Looking for some feedback on this one. Everything I write is right in that same melodic midtempo kind of song. This was my attempt to write something more uptempo. In the same vain as Brent's "compliment sandwich", how about one think you like about it, and one thing you don't. We'll call it a "one and one", like in basketball. Thanks for listening!
I was thinking the same thing as Rhonda, before I read her remark, needs to focus on Country, But as I am listening,it does make the mark in country , it is a comparison song which I think is pretty popular these days
July 17, 2020
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Hey Rick, one thing good about your song is it doesn’t need much to make it work for you.
I hope my two cents worth is worth the rub between your thoughts and fingertips. I’m no pro songwriter but the first thing I would change is the title of the song. Keep what you have and add some additional word(s) to create something stronger. Play around with it , dig deeper and once that title appears. Create an awesome hook line for the chorus and/or the verses. Play around with the structure by tweaking some lines. and keep your current point of view as it is.
I like the production but wasn’t too fond of the melody.
Thanks for sharing and Happy ♫ Songwriting!
August 13, 2020
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Thanks for the feedback, Ronnie! Much appreciated! Are you Williamsburg, Ohio, as in Clermont County east of Cincinnati? I live close to Harrison,, Ohio west of Cincy…..Yeah, you know, I changed my title from I Choose Country when I was 75% done with the song, and I think that threw my lyrics off a bit. I got little away from the hook…. I do plan to go back to it at some point to try to take from an okay song to a great song. They always sound better in my head than how they turn out after recording them!
August 13, 2020
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Your welcome Rick. A lot of things sound better in my head too. I sent you a message on my current location.
August 15, 2020
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I really like this song and think it has hit potential. The best parts for me are the fresh clever lyrics/rhymes and the memorable chorus. The theme is cool and the song flows very well. My only edit would be to maybe write a better melody for the bridge (it kind of sounds too much like the the rest of the song- why not lift it a bit?). A tiny lyric idea might be “keeping up with Kim Kardashian” - so that it is a perfect rhyme with fashion. (Again- another example of your excellent lyric work which catches the listener from the first verse all through). This song is SOLID- great work, man!
February 11, 2021
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Holden,
After listening to your songs, that is a really nice compliment. Listening to your demos was a humbling experience for me, so thank you very much.
Rick
February 11, 2021
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I’m All Country
(Written by: Rick Allan Lane)
Verse
Well I can crank it up with some classic Van Halen
But I’d rather lay back and play a little way back Waylon
I like all different kinds of music
Songs you can sing along or tap your foot to it
From Blue Oyster Cult
To bluegrass from Kentucky
I don’t mind it funky
But I’m all country
Chorus
Rolling Stones or some old George Jones
Black ties in Paris or county fairs from back home
Keepin’ up with those Kardashians
Or girls in Daisy Dukes and cowboy boots kind of fashion
A tabloid beauty or a southern honey
I’m all country
I’m all country
I’m all country
Verse
I’m sure there’s nothin’ like a New Year’s Eve in Time Square
But I’ll take a small town main street in the middle of nowhere
I can be happy livin’ anywhere
As long as I’m living, really, I don’t care
On a beach in The Keys
Or rocky top Tennessee
I love this land of the free
But I’m all country
Chorus
Bridge
There’s lots of beautiful, exotic women ’round this world
But there ain’t nothing that compares to those country girls
Chorus
Copyright © Rick Allan Lane
0
I’ve already commented on this song on another site, but I wanted to “like” the song here.
There’s a lot to love about this song, from the tempo and energy to the message. My main problem with the song is that it needs to focus entirely on being country.
It has great potential, and I love the song, with a few modifications.
July 02, 2020
0
I was thinking the same thing as Rhonda, before I read her remark, needs to focus on Country, But as I am listening,it does make the mark in country , it is a comparison song which I think is pretty popular these days
July 17, 2020
0
Hey Rick, one thing good about your song is it doesn’t need much to make it work for you.
I hope my two cents worth is worth the rub between your thoughts and fingertips. I’m no pro songwriter but the first thing I would change is the title of the song. Keep what you have and add some additional word(s) to create something stronger. Play around with it , dig deeper and once that title appears. Create an awesome hook line for the chorus and/or the verses. Play around with the structure by tweaking some lines. and keep your current point of view as it is.
I like the production but wasn’t too fond of the melody.
Thanks for sharing and Happy ♫ Songwriting!
August 13, 2020
0
Thanks for the feedback, Ronnie! Much appreciated! Are you Williamsburg, Ohio, as in Clermont County east of Cincinnati? I live close to Harrison,, Ohio west of Cincy…..Yeah, you know, I changed my title from I Choose Country when I was 75% done with the song, and I think that threw my lyrics off a bit. I got little away from the hook…. I do plan to go back to it at some point to try to take from an okay song to a great song. They always sound better in my head than how they turn out after recording them!
August 13, 2020
0
Your welcome Rick. A lot of things sound better in my head too. I sent you a message on my current location.
August 15, 2020
0
I really like this song and think it has hit potential. The best parts for me are the fresh clever lyrics/rhymes and the memorable chorus. The theme is cool and the song flows very well. My only edit would be to maybe write a better melody for the bridge (it kind of sounds too much like the the rest of the song- why not lift it a bit?). A tiny lyric idea might be “keeping up with Kim Kardashian” - so that it is a perfect rhyme with fashion. (Again- another example of your excellent lyric work which catches the listener from the first verse all through). This song is SOLID- great work, man!
February 11, 2021
0
Holden,
After listening to your songs, that is a really nice compliment. Listening to your demos was a humbling experience for me, so thank you very much.
Rick
February 11, 2021
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Rhonda Reid
I’ve already commented on this song on another site, but I wanted to “like” the song here.
There’s a lot to love about this song, from the tempo and energy to the message. My main problem with the song is that it needs to focus entirely on being country.
It has great potential, and I love the song, with a few modifications.
July 02, 2020
No members have liked this comment.