I wrote this song as I was ''getting over'' somebody without really being over her. Thus, the lyrics revolve alot around the cold and time.
Anything you can think of would be appreciated. think it's too dull? repetitive? I'm open to suggestions!
Thanks for the positive feedback Dennis! I’m glad to be part of the community.
January 22, 2014
Phillippe,
I think there are a lot of good things in this song. It has a haunting quality which I think works very well. I would make 2 suggestions:
1) I do think that musically it needs a break in the middle to keep it from becoming monotonous. It wouldn’t take much - maybe a simple 2 line bridge which has a completely different melody.
2) While I like the ending, I think it goes on too long. I would either shorten it or bring in some kind of a guitar lead behind the last half of it,
But overall - neat sound,
Dick
January 25, 2014
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Thanks for the ideas! I’ll give your suggestions a spin and try to work something out, thanks for your time 
January 27, 2014
Happy to give feedback. I look forward to hearing the revised version.
January 28, 2014
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Phillipe,
Welcome to Frettie! Thanks for sharing this. I really like this. The guitar is nice and simple, which allows your lyrics and vocals to stand out nice.
When the song first started, it had a cool Goo Goo Dolls feel to it. Nice to see how the song progressed along, and the way you end the song is really nice.
I look forward to hearing more of your music and seeing your feedback to others on Frettie.
January 22, 2014
1
Thanks for the positive feedback Dennis! I’m glad to be part of the community.
January 22, 2014
0
Phillippe,
I think there are a lot of good things in this song. It has a haunting quality which I think works very well. I would make 2 suggestions:
1) I do think that musically it needs a break in the middle to keep it from becoming monotonous. It wouldn’t take much - maybe a simple 2 line bridge which has a completely different melody.
2) While I like the ending, I think it goes on too long. I would either shorten it or bring in some kind of a guitar lead behind the last half of it,
But overall - neat sound,
Dick
January 25, 2014
1
Thanks for the ideas! I’ll give your suggestions a spin and try to work something out, thanks for your time
January 27, 2014
0
Happy to give feedback. I look forward to hearing the revised version.
January 28, 2014
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Dennis Field
Phillipe,
Welcome to Frettie! Thanks for sharing this. I really like this. The guitar is nice and simple, which allows your lyrics and vocals to stand out nice.
When the song first started, it had a cool Goo Goo Dolls feel to it. Nice to see how the song progressed along, and the way you end the song is really nice.
I look forward to hearing more of your music and seeing your feedback to others on Frettie.
January 22, 2014
No members have liked this comment.