Hey girl, we tied one on last night
the shots kept coming-- we were feeling alright
got a text this morning from the guy at the end of the night
Ain't gonna lie, my memories a little faint
looking for my girls to unfog the brain
who recalls how tall, how smart, how rich, his name?

Drunk goggles have impaired my vision before
when I went shopping at the boyfriend store
Got a big surprise when I opened the door (OH Lord)
Promised myself I wouldn't drink no more

Took two of something in the bathroom drawer
With a rag on my head, I peeled a ripe banana
laid out on the ice cold tile on the kitchen floor
Tell me again what did he look like
Did the whiskey play a trick on my eyesight
Is he gonna be the same as I thought in the bright daylight

Drunk goggles have impaired my vision before
when I went shopping at the boyfriend store
Got a big surprise when I opened the door (OH Shit)
Promised myself wouldn't drink no more

If you, are guilty of drinking 'em cute
When you're sippin' on gin and a guy walks in
and your girlfriends say "he's a toad with funny grin!"
Take a good look hon at the warning sign
if you drink to much, you might go blind
and make a date with a long tooth troll with a pick-up line
watch out for the long tooth troll with a pick-up line