A breakup song, written with a friend
Hi James
This is a really nice song you have, sad but true and it hits home I am sure on lots of marriages. Cool melody kind of smooth eerie feeling I liked. Overall nice song and keep em coming . Thanks for sharing
January 13, 2020
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I like this song a lot. It is very vulnerable and real.
I think the way you wrote this line is very clever:
“Are you happy in that bed you made
When you’re lying there awake?”
My only feedback to make it better is to perhaps see if you can tell the story with more imagery in it? I think the chorus is very strong and I like the twist you put on it. It’s really cool. The only thing missing for me are the verses having a few more images in there to bring the story to life and make it more visual in my head.
January 15, 2020
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I BLAME YOU
J Edwards, T Makrush
Let me offer up an apology
For what I'm about to say
There are things I've done while with you
That I regret today
You see I'm sorry for our first date
And the kiss at your front door
I'm sorry that I held you close
That I ever wanted more, and I
[chorus]
I blame myself for loving you
I blame myself for the wasted time
I blame myself for the wedding ring
You wore when you were mine
But for the scars on my heart
And for tearing us apart
I blame you
What happened to the love we had
And the girl I thought was you
How could you walk away from us
Does he love you like I do
Is it everything you wanted
Or was it all a big mistake
Are you happy in that bed you made
When you're lying there awake?
[repeat chorus 2x]
0
Hi James
This is a really nice song you have, sad but true and it hits home I am sure on lots of marriages. Cool melody kind of smooth eerie feeling I liked. Overall nice song and keep em coming . Thanks for sharing
January 13, 2020
0
I like this song a lot. It is very vulnerable and real.
I think the way you wrote this line is very clever:
“Are you happy in that bed you made
When you’re lying there awake?”
My only feedback to make it better is to perhaps see if you can tell the story with more imagery in it? I think the chorus is very strong and I like the twist you put on it. It’s really cool. The only thing missing for me are the verses having a few more images in there to bring the story to life and make it more visual in my head.
January 15, 2020
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Corey Bourque
great song the message i surly get
January 12, 2020
No members have liked this comment.