The story behind this song is I just had an idea of someone who knows that their relationship was over.
Want feedback on everything but the performance. Singing is a demo singer from a studio in Nashville. I own all rights to all my songs.
Hey, Laramie! Thanks for sharing your song with us. I like that it has some groove to it- in general, tempo is more commercial. “Heartache with a beat” is generally a good way to go for country. The title is different, so I dig that. Makes me wonder what the song is about.
Keep on writing!
June 21, 2019
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Hi Laramie:
Laramie:
I love it when I hear a really different way of expressing a common theme, and this does that. as was said, a little more detail, illustration, etc. would be helpful. Also, Just my opinion, on “the fat lady” line I would put the strong rhythmic stress on La of Lady, and then use “ain’t” instead of isn’t. The Fat LAdy ain’t singin yet. That’s just the way I hear it, and as always one person’s opinion. Good job!
Ric Kirk
June 26, 2019
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Never thought I'll see this day
Don't really know what to say
We use to be so close
But that was yesterday
I guess our fire went out
without a scream or shout
I had a tough time believing
But now I have no doubt
(pre-chorus)
Don't worry about me
I can take it
take it
I know you're gonna leave
So just say it
say it
(chorus)
There's no train in site
but I feel the rumble
The sky's still clear
but I hear the thunder
You might not leave today
but I know it's coming
The fat lady isn't singing yet,
but I can hear her humming
Goodnight is our only kiss
Love you are the words I miss
We don't even touch
I remember when we couldn't resist
I ignored your writings on the wall
Clues I never caught
It's too late now
but I see them all
(pre-chorus)
Don't worry about me
I can take it
take it
I know you're gonna leave
So just say it
say it
(chorus)
There's no train in site
but I feel the rumble
The sky's still clear
but I hear the thunder
You might not leave today
but I know it's coming
The fat lady isn't singing yet,
but I can hear her humming
(close)
You might not leave today
but I know it's coming
The fat lady isn't singing yet,
but I can hear her humming
I can hear her humming
0
Hey Laramie, thank you for sharing your song with us.
I like the chorus and the hook of the song - ‘hearing the fat lady humming’ - that’s a pretty cool idea! You could use some more pictures in the verse lyrics and show us the little signs why you feel you gonna lose her. Little details will make your lyric more unique.
Keep on writing!
June 20, 2019
0
Hey, Laramie! Thanks for sharing your song with us. I like that it has some groove to it- in general, tempo is more commercial. “Heartache with a beat” is generally a good way to go for country. The title is different, so I dig that. Makes me wonder what the song is about.
Keep on writing!
June 21, 2019
0
Hi Laramie:
Laramie:
I love it when I hear a really different way of expressing a common theme, and this does that. as was said, a little more detail, illustration, etc. would be helpful. Also, Just my opinion, on “the fat lady” line I would put the strong rhythmic stress on La of Lady, and then use “ain’t” instead of isn’t. The Fat LAdy ain’t singin yet. That’s just the way I hear it, and as always one person’s opinion. Good job!
Ric Kirk
June 26, 2019
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Frank Renfordt
Hey Laramie, thank you for sharing your song with us.
I like the chorus and the hook of the song - ‘hearing the fat lady humming’ - that’s a pretty cool idea! You could use some more pictures in the verse lyrics and show us the little signs why you feel you gonna lose her. Little details will make your lyric more unique.
Keep on writing!
June 20, 2019
No members have liked this comment.