The end goal was to write a song about what it's like to be caught up in the atmosphere of Memphis. I ended up writing this from the point of view of someone missing that experience and the life they once had.
I request feedback on the lyrics and the whole song in general. Everything but the singing. I do not sing. This is sung by a great demo singer I use sometimes named Chas Evans.
Thank you so much Brent for reviewing my song and I appreciate the feedback. This means a lot to me to have a successful songwriter review and actually find something positive in it.
June 18, 2019
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Hey Laramie, yeah, this feeling comes across!
I think the song needs to be produced with more instruments, especially to separate the sections a bit more. The way it is, it is hard to tell where the verse ends and the chorus starts. But overall it has a good vibe!
June 20, 2019
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Overall, the musical feel fits well with the them The first/third verse lyrics feel a little redundant with all of the miss/ings. Also, I think there’s too much time between some of the lines. The chorus lyrics and melody flow much better. Nice work.
October 11, 2019
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On nights like this.
I get drunk on Lead Belly songs,
Missing that street,
missing that town,
missing that feeling,
missing that sound.
I'm missing you, the most I...Guess...
On Nights like this.....
On nights like this,
We would go down,
Walk that street,
It was our town,
Never will forget that feeling,
Breathing in those sounds,
The moon's slow southern kiss,........
On Nights like this......
(chorus)
On nights like this,
I close my eyes,
I'm walking down Beale,
You're by my side,
The river sounds so clear,
Bar-B-Que & Gospel in the air,
Memphis at it's best,
Can I get an amen,
I need an amen,
On nights like this.....
On nights like this.....
On nights like this,
Words not said, I regret,
I miss my love,
I miss my soul,
I miss my life,
I miss our home,
True feelings get dismissed,
On nights like this
(chorus)
On nights like this,
I close my eyes,
I'm walking down Beale,
You're by my side,
The river sounds so clear,
Bar-B-Que & Gospel in the air,
Memphis at it's best,
Can I get an amen,
I need an amen,
On nights like this.....
On nights like this.....
On nights like this,
I can't believe we're apart,
You didn't slip through my fingers,
it was more of a drop,
I know everything I miss,
On nights like this.....
(chorus)
On nights like this,
I close my eyes,
I'm walking down Beale,
You're by my side,
The river sounds so clear,
Bar-B-Que & Gospel in the air,
Memphis at it's best,
Can I get an amen,
I need an amen,
On nights like this.....
On nights like this.....
Can I get an amen,
I need an amen,
On nights like this....
0
Hi, Laramie! Thanks for sharing your music with us. I like the vibe of the song. I like the 1st line (and others, too). I think you’d be well-served to only do one verse before you do the chorus. Maybe combine the 1st 2 verses into one… Felt like it took a long time to get to the chorus.
Some good stuff here- thanks for sharing!
June 18, 2019
0
Thank you so much Brent for reviewing my song and I appreciate the feedback. This means a lot to me to have a successful songwriter review and actually find something positive in it.
June 18, 2019
0
Hey Laramie, yeah, this feeling comes across!
I think the song needs to be produced with more instruments, especially to separate the sections a bit more. The way it is, it is hard to tell where the verse ends and the chorus starts. But overall it has a good vibe!
June 20, 2019
0
Overall, the musical feel fits well with the them The first/third verse lyrics feel a little redundant with all of the miss/ings. Also, I think there’s too much time between some of the lines. The chorus lyrics and melody flow much better. Nice work.
October 11, 2019
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Brent Baxter
Hi, Laramie! Thanks for sharing your music with us. I like the vibe of the song. I like the 1st line (and others, too). I think you’d be well-served to only do one verse before you do the chorus. Maybe combine the 1st 2 verses into one… Felt like it took a long time to get to the chorus.
Some good stuff here- thanks for sharing!
June 18, 2019
No members have liked this comment.