I wrote this song about 10 years ago. I was noticing a shift in the country landscape, and I wanted to find a unique way to say it. At the time, I was also wondering what would some of the old pioneers think of "today's country".
I would love your feedback on the concept, and if this makes sense. What would you change? How can I make this better? I feel like out of al the songs I have written this one always feels like it has a ton of potential. I appologize for the quality.
Kevin,
Thanks so much for the feedback. I am happy that you feel like this makes sense. I too believe some of the lyrics could be tighter. I will work on getting them posted. I’m happy you like the direction and found the references.
Appreciate your feedback!
September 17, 2013
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Dennis,
Like Kevin, I would like to see the lyric. Because your voice is lower and the guitar a little loud (relative to your voice), it was hard to catch some of the words. But in general, I like the idea and feel of it. I thought the melancholy feel was okay because you are bemoaning the passing of that era. I would like to hear a little more differentiation (melodically) between the chorus and the verse. You have some, but it is subtle. Make your chorus stand out and be memorable. It is usually the main point of your song. Having said all that, I think you have a good song here.
Dennis - you have a vocal style which is reminiscent of old time country. That’s good because I think your style fits both you and that kind of music. My only suggestion, in this regard, is don’t let your style obscure your lyric. In country music, in particular, the story is all important. I would suggest finding a way to keep your style, but somehow enunciate your words a little better’ thus. letting listeners both hear your lyric better and enjoy the way you sing.
October 05, 2013
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Thanks for the feedback Dick. I will be adding Lyrics to these songs in the neat future. Great tip on the vocals. I’m glad you like my style, and can’t wait to build on it with some fundamentals.
October 08, 2013
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Dennis,
I agree with Kevin and Dick, that the lyric seems to get overpowered by the guitar in your recording, so it’s really hard to catch all of your references to the bygone “era”, but overall, I really enjoyed your homage.
This song falls into the category that I call, “expressionist”, rather than the typical country story song, with a beginning, middle and end. Rather than giving us character, conflict, and resolution, you’ve expressed your feelings about a subject, by references and comparisons between old and new, and given us the opportunity to share your emotion.
Nicely done!
Gary
May 23, 2014
Gary,
Thank you for the feedback on my song as well as Frettie. I been meaning to get the lyrics posted, as perhaps this weekend I’ll have the time to do so.
You nailed my goal for that song. I really just wanted to pay homage to the past and see how I could maybe string those songs/artists into a something that was meaningful and enjoyable to listen to.
May 23, 2014
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0
Man, there were so many references to that beloved bygone era of country music! It’d be interesting to get the lyrics in front of me so that I can see just how many more I may have missed! This is a great concept! I like how balanced it seems, like you’re acknowledging how amazing that era was, so it’s celebratory, yet ‘Hank is rolling in his grave.’ I’m sort of torn wether I want the tempo to be faster. But, it’s not entirely a happy song so a quicker pace might actually do harm. You also could work on the words just a bit to make the phrasing of them fit better in the musical bars. Just like how country music used to fit better in dive bars. Thanks for sharing!
September 17, 2013
0
Kevin,
Thanks so much for the feedback. I am happy that you feel like this makes sense. I too believe some of the lyrics could be tighter. I will work on getting them posted. I’m happy you like the direction and found the references.
Appreciate your feedback!
September 17, 2013
0
Dennis,
Like Kevin, I would like to see the lyric. Because your voice is lower and the guitar a little loud (relative to your voice), it was hard to catch some of the words. But in general, I like the idea and feel of it. I thought the melancholy feel was okay because you are bemoaning the passing of that era. I would like to hear a little more differentiation (melodically) between the chorus and the verse. You have some, but it is subtle. Make your chorus stand out and be memorable. It is usually the main point of your song. Having said all that, I think you have a good song here.
Dennis - you have a vocal style which is reminiscent of old time country. That’s good because I think your style fits both you and that kind of music. My only suggestion, in this regard, is don’t let your style obscure your lyric. In country music, in particular, the story is all important. I would suggest finding a way to keep your style, but somehow enunciate your words a little better’ thus. letting listeners both hear your lyric better and enjoy the way you sing.
October 05, 2013
0
Thanks for the feedback Dick. I will be adding Lyrics to these songs in the neat future. Great tip on the vocals. I’m glad you like my style, and can’t wait to build on it with some fundamentals.
October 08, 2013
1
Dennis,
I agree with Kevin and Dick, that the lyric seems to get overpowered by the guitar in your recording, so it’s really hard to catch all of your references to the bygone “era”, but overall, I really enjoyed your homage.
This song falls into the category that I call, “expressionist”, rather than the typical country story song, with a beginning, middle and end. Rather than giving us character, conflict, and resolution, you’ve expressed your feelings about a subject, by references and comparisons between old and new, and given us the opportunity to share your emotion.
Nicely done!
Gary
May 23, 2014
0
Gary,
Thank you for the feedback on my song as well as Frettie. I been meaning to get the lyrics posted, as perhaps this weekend I’ll have the time to do so.
You nailed my goal for that song. I really just wanted to pay homage to the past and see how I could maybe string those songs/artists into a something that was meaningful and enjoyable to listen to.
May 23, 2014
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Kēvin Clayton Jr.
Man, there were so many references to that beloved bygone era of country music! It’d be interesting to get the lyrics in front of me so that I can see just how many more I may have missed! This is a great concept! I like how balanced it seems, like you’re acknowledging how amazing that era was, so it’s celebratory, yet ‘Hank is rolling in his grave.’ I’m sort of torn wether I want the tempo to be faster. But, it’s not entirely a happy song so a quicker pace might actually do harm. You also could work on the words just a bit to make the phrasing of them fit better in the musical bars. Just like how country music used to fit better in dive bars. Thanks for sharing!
September 17, 2013
No members have liked this comment.