Every girl wants to find someone who will love her for her whole life, with a devotion that lasts even beyond death, just as Romeo and Juliet's love.
Hi there Linne! Brent made a good choice in spotlighting this song. It’s beautiful both vocally and lyrically. I would not change anything about it. Great job!
October 17, 2017
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Great song Linne! Very beautifully written.
I personally hear this as a song for either The Shires or Carrie Underwood (e.g. like Wine After Whiskey or Good In Goodbye) if you’re going for the country-pop vibe!
October 17, 2017
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Really like this song! I don’t think the D word is off putting, it’s in context. I’m newer to the country genre but this song made me think of some of Dolly Parton’s - a strong image clearly and beautifully told.
October 21, 2017
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Hi Linne > The universal theme connects. Everyone wants that perfect love to come along. Nice Flat top work, Lovely vocal.
October 23, 2017
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I like the vocal register transitions. They make the song very listenable and interesting. The word death in the chorus does not hit me in the wrong way at all.
If you are looking for areas where I think you could strengthen the lyric…
The line “a trust I’ve never felt” is difficult to connect with. I can see where you are going with the line but it doesn’t feel like something you would actually say, at least not in that way, if you were telling your story to a friend. You might say I’ve never felt trust and I want to, but I don’t think you would say it this way. I think that is why it doesn’t resonate.
If you replaced it with a line like “A love that I won’t regret” it would be cliche but it would be more conversationally natural.
Great song wither way. Love your writing style!
February 05, 2018
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Hi Linne! The hook is absolutely gorgeous! I think you voice the feelings of many people here. I am not an expert writer. I go by feelings when I hear a song and this touched the right spot in my heart…great work:)
July 17, 2018
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Hey Linne, I don’t mind death in the song either (guessing you remember that about me)... it’s on theme. Did you have a replacement in mind though?
There’s potential to sneak in something with “forget,” which is a stronger rhyme with Juliet. spitballing and perhaps missing your internal rhyme:
I want a love that’s so strong that
the world will ever forget
In any case, I think what you have conveys that same sentiment. It’s not canon that Romeo and Juliet’s love lasted longer than death…however, it has endured because we don’t forget.
Cool tune! As for pitching, it seems tough. Does anyone sing this type of vulnerable song anymore?
September 20, 2019
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Like Juliet
Linne Black and Bev Hingson
Waking up from a dream
Something in a Shakespeare scene
A boy and girl who loved more than anything
More than anything
Then reality sets in
Here I am with a broken heart again
I know what I need, I know what I need
chorus
I wanna be loved like Juliet
More than a touch, more than a crush
With trust I've never felt
I want a love that's stronger
Lasts longer then death
I wanna be loved, I wanna be loved
Like Juliet
Can it be too much to ask
To find a love like that
Where eternity begins right from the start
Right from the start
But I'm not gonna rush this thing
My true love will find his way to me
I'll know him by heart, I'll know him by heart
ch
Then I'll be loved like Juliet
More than a touch, more than a crush
With trust I've never felt
I'll have a love that's stronger
Lasts longer than death
I wanna be loved, I wanna be loved
bridge
I may not know where my forever is
At this moment all I know is this
I want a love that's stronger
Lasts longer than death
I wanna be loved, I wanna be loved
I wanna be loved, I wanna be loved
Like Juliet
0
Hey, Linne! Thanks for sharing your song with us. I dig the vibe and the idea. It feels honest and emotional. I dig it. I don’t mind the “death” in the chorus. It’s not morbid, but it’s on-theme. Fits well.
Overall, I dig it! Pretty. Keep writing!
October 16, 2017
0
Hi there Linne! Brent made a good choice in spotlighting this song. It’s beautiful both vocally and lyrically. I would not change anything about it. Great job!
October 17, 2017
0
Great song Linne! Very beautifully written.
I personally hear this as a song for either The Shires or Carrie Underwood (e.g. like Wine After Whiskey or Good In Goodbye) if you’re going for the country-pop vibe!
October 17, 2017
0
Really like this song! I don’t think the D word is off putting, it’s in context. I’m newer to the country genre but this song made me think of some of Dolly Parton’s - a strong image clearly and beautifully told.
October 21, 2017
0
Hi Linne > The universal theme connects. Everyone wants that perfect love to come along. Nice Flat top work, Lovely vocal.
October 23, 2017
0
I like the vocal register transitions. They make the song very listenable and interesting. The word death in the chorus does not hit me in the wrong way at all.
If you are looking for areas where I think you could strengthen the lyric…
The line “a trust I’ve never felt” is difficult to connect with. I can see where you are going with the line but it doesn’t feel like something you would actually say, at least not in that way, if you were telling your story to a friend. You might say I’ve never felt trust and I want to, but I don’t think you would say it this way. I think that is why it doesn’t resonate.
If you replaced it with a line like “A love that I won’t regret” it would be cliche but it would be more conversationally natural.
Great song wither way. Love your writing style!
February 05, 2018
0
Hi Linne! The hook is absolutely gorgeous! I think you voice the feelings of many people here. I am not an expert writer. I go by feelings when I hear a song and this touched the right spot in my heart…great work:)
July 17, 2018
0
Hey Linne, I don’t mind death in the song either (guessing you remember that about me)... it’s on theme. Did you have a replacement in mind though?
There’s potential to sneak in something with “forget,” which is a stronger rhyme with Juliet. spitballing and perhaps missing your internal rhyme:
I want a love that’s so strong that
the world will ever forget
In any case, I think what you have conveys that same sentiment. It’s not canon that Romeo and Juliet’s love lasted longer than death…however, it has endured because we don’t forget.
Cool tune! As for pitching, it seems tough. Does anyone sing this type of vulnerable song anymore?
September 20, 2019
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Brent Baxter
Hey, Linne! Thanks for sharing your song with us. I dig the vibe and the idea. It feels honest and emotional. I dig it. I don’t mind the “death” in the chorus. It’s not morbid, but it’s on-theme. Fits well.
Overall, I dig it! Pretty. Keep writing!
October 16, 2017
No members have liked this comment.