This song was inspired by songs such as "Everybody Get Together" from the Sixties and also by a performance of "The Way of the Waters" by the Perpetual Peace Project which may be seen on YouTube.
What do you think of this song? Does it need another verse or maybe a bridge? Is the melody strong enough? Does the imagery support the meaning?
I like the message and the poetry of your lyrics. Nice contrast musically with the verse and chorus. I would play around with the melody to see what else might develop.
I agree with Dennis that adding a bridge would help build the song further.
Happy songwriting 
April 14, 2015
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The melody for the verse needs a look I think. The chorus starts well, but the halted third line seems to stop the flow in its tracks.
Whether it needs a bridge partly depends on how it will be performed. probably does solo, with a band, instruments, harmonies a bridge maybe less important here. Lyrically the bridge would need to fit.
Could develop into a good song, but not there yet. Thanks for sharing David.
July 19, 2015
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Rivers run to the seamless sea
Waters rise to soaring sky
Clouds take shape, with winds do flee
Rain comes to land filling fields so dry
This is the water's way
This is an endless flow
Get togethers seem too few
We're like water, please don't be shy
Similar routes we may find are few
But that ocean is our common end
So think of others as the same as you
Let's flow together, be my friend
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David, Thanks for sharing. I think this song could use a bridge. I’m not completely pulled into the melody or imagery yet, but this is one of those songs where I’m intrigued with it, but not yet hooked. I’m going to follow along with the feedback for sure to see what others say and to see where this goes next. Thanks!
April 12, 2015
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The melody for the verse needs a look I think. The chorus starts well, but the halted third line seems to stop the flow in its tracks.
Whether it needs a bridge partly depends on how it will be performed. probably does solo, with a band, instruments, harmonies a bridge maybe less important here. Lyrically the bridge would need to fit.
Could develop into a good song, but not there yet. Thanks for sharing David.
July 19, 2015
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Dennis Field
David, Thanks for sharing. I think this song could use a bridge. I’m not completely pulled into the melody or imagery yet, but this is one of those songs where I’m intrigued with it, but not yet hooked. I’m going to follow along with the feedback for sure to see what others say and to see where this goes next. Thanks!
April 12, 2015
No members have liked this comment.