I am dealing with a Dad and sister that are both dying of cancer. So I wanted to write a song from the perspective of the person who is deceased and what they would tell us if they could.
Any is welcome
Great new and different perspective, lots of great imagery, lots of emotion there.
I also agree with Steve. This music overcomes the lyrics which really matter on this one.
April 23, 2026
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Thank you Steve and DeeDee, I appreciate the feedback and I am working on that now.
April 28, 2026
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Remember dancin’ barefoot in our kitchen glow
Coffee burnin’, laughin’ till the stars put on a show
You’d wrap me up when thunder shook the roof
Said “I got you forever,” and you spoke the truth
Yeah, a part of you died when I did
But not the part I loved the most, not the heart you hid
So go be him, go chase that fire again
Be the man that made my whole world spin
I’ll be watchin’ from my view
You bein’ your best you...
Late-night drives, windows down, singin’ off-key loud
Held my hand through doctor calls that broke us to the ground
You promised me forever, and you never backed away
Now I’m askin’ you to keep that promise every day
Yeah, a part of you died when I did
But not the part I loved the most, not the heart you hid
So go be him, go chase that fire again
Be the man that made my whole world spin
I’ll be watchin’ from my view
You bein’ your best youuu!!
Don’t think I left to watch you waste away
I’m still smilin’ when you laugh, still close when you pray
This ain’t goodbye, it’s just a different kind of near
Live loud enough for both of us right here!!]
Yeah, a part of you died when I did
But not the part I loved the most, not the heart you hid
Go be him, go chase that fire again
Be the man that made my whole world spin
I’ll be watchin’ from my view
You bein’ your best you
(Go be him… your best you…)
I’ll be watchin’…
You bein’ your best you…
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You’ve got the makings of a really good song…with a lot of heart. My advice would be to ease back on some of the power chorus’s, es[ecially in the beginning. Let the heart of the song speak…let the simplicity of the emotion take control….and then the music solo interlude that comes in becomes that much more powerful and impactful…then you let that emotion build….until….you take it down to a quieter, acoustic guitar accompaniement…...and end again with some of that power misic leading to a soft, solo acoustic end. My two cents—- good luck!
April 22, 2026
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Great new and different perspective, lots of great imagery, lots of emotion there.
I also agree with Steve. This music overcomes the lyrics which really matter on this one.
April 23, 2026
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Thank you Steve and DeeDee, I appreciate the feedback and I am working on that now.
April 28, 2026
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Steve Kaye
You’ve got the makings of a really good song…with a lot of heart. My advice would be to ease back on some of the power chorus’s, es[ecially in the beginning. Let the heart of the song speak…let the simplicity of the emotion take control….and then the music solo interlude that comes in becomes that much more powerful and impactful…then you let that emotion build….until….you take it down to a quieter, acoustic guitar accompaniement…...and end again with some of that power misic leading to a soft, solo acoustic end. My two cents—- good luck!
April 22, 2026
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