This is part of my back catalog. Written as a response to 911.
Lyrics Lyrics Lyrics, and melody,
This was recorded with several friends who knew a bunch about recording, but not much about how to get a song "heard." I played this song for a few friends, put it on my social media, but didn't know what to do next.
My friends liked it, so now I would love some feedback from more experienced writers.
The guy who did the final mix picked a bad vocal take.
Hey, Rusty! Thanks for sharing your song with us. I agree with Jayne- it could be some sort of synch thing. I think the topic and lyrical sensibility lend themselves to that.
I like how the melody lifts from the verse to the chorus. Good structure, good focus of the lyric.
If you’re going for getting this cut by a country artist, I think the imagery needs to level up. Paint more distinct pictures, as opposed to these more general statements and pictures. You’d need to bring some imagery that’s both true, resonating, interesting, fresh and compelling. No easy task. But that IS the task before you.
Overall, it’s a nice song. Thanks for sharing it with us. Please pay it forward by leaving a comment on another writer’s song. Thanks!
December 14, 2017
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Fly Your Flag
Rusty Perez
copyright 2001
V1
We are a part of a mighty nation.
We stand together; We stand secure.
From different peoples, we've built this country.
And from one heart our blood runs pure.
C
Fly your flag, across America.
And put one hand, upon your heart.
And hold the other, out to your brother.
And together, we'll stand as one.
v2
The light of Liberty, it shines upon us.
The hand of justice, its aim is true.
so shine your light, into the shadows.
Under God, our way is sure.
C
B
And when the darkness hides the light
Let your courage flare until Justice shines through.
And let the stars shine over the red white and blue.
C repeat three times with key-change
0
Nice job Rusty. I could see the song in some sort of sync placement maybe… something that would need patriotic music. Not sure where you’re from, but local TV stations look for that kind of thing.
December 13, 2017
0
Hey, Rusty! Thanks for sharing your song with us. I agree with Jayne- it could be some sort of synch thing. I think the topic and lyrical sensibility lend themselves to that.
I like how the melody lifts from the verse to the chorus. Good structure, good focus of the lyric.
If you’re going for getting this cut by a country artist, I think the imagery needs to level up. Paint more distinct pictures, as opposed to these more general statements and pictures. You’d need to bring some imagery that’s both true, resonating, interesting, fresh and compelling. No easy task. But that IS the task before you.
Overall, it’s a nice song. Thanks for sharing it with us. Please pay it forward by leaving a comment on another writer’s song. Thanks!
December 14, 2017
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Jayne Sachs
Nice job Rusty. I could see the song in some sort of sync placement maybe… something that would need patriotic music. Not sure where you’re from, but local TV stations look for that kind of thing.
December 13, 2017
No members have liked this comment.